3. AIM CLEARLY (vs. 26)

            Paul says, “I run in such a way as not without aim.”  I saw a lady in a track meet win her race by several yards but be disqualified because she ran out of her lane for a period.  It is too easy to be distracted, to be unclear about what really matters, to miss the importance of commitment and sacrifice, or to forget that trying too many things is at least as bad in its outcome as trying too few things.  These kinds of things disqualify too many.  Aim means the eliminating of everything but the objective of your aim.  Are there a few things at which you are aiming?  What strategy are you employing to reach them?  Is your aim and strategy in writing? (It should be.)  Is it clear and really important to you? (It should be.)  How about to others?  To try too little is to guarantee a small outcome. To try everything is to guarantee that you will do nothing well.  Aim in order to win.

4. GIVE UP THE RIGHT TO FEEL GOOD IN THE SHORT TERM (vs. 27)

            It’s a sad part of the human condition that we let happiness matter more to us than winning.  Look at the face of the man who scores the winning touchdown.  Happy?  You bet.  Look at that same face when he’s been at practice for two hours in the hot sun and his coach is in his face yelling at him.  Happy?  Not at all.  Yet without paying the price of seemingly thankless preparation, he would not have won.  All the most important things in life require not just self-discipline but self-sacrifice.  That’s the point of verse 27.  Want a great marriage when you’re 60?  Self-sacrifice will be required now.  Want great kids when they’re 35?  More self-sacrifice.  Want great standing when you retire among your peers?  More self-sacrifice.  You have to be prepared to sacrifice good feelings, relaxation, and contentment in the present to be able to win at something in the future.  Nobody gets to the Promised Land on an escalator.  Everybody has to walk over sharp rocks at times.  Part of getting there is being willing to pay that price.

            I hope this helps in your developing a winning strategy.

In a sermon a few weeks ago I made the offhand remark that parents should teach their children to win with grace and lose with faith.  Elizabeth Gibbons’ thoughtfully asked through e-mail, “I understand winning with grace, but how can we lose with faith?”  This is a great question for us all, and I want to spend the next several columns fleshing out my too brief e-mail answer to Elizabeth’s question.  So thanks, Elizabeth, for listening critically and asking a really helpful question.  In the next several blogs I will cover:

1. Winning with Grace         
2. Having a desire to win
3. Having a worthwhile goal
4. Developing a strategy for winning
5. Taking responsibility with gratitude
6. Losing with Faith
7. Things worth losing
8. Possessing the faith to learn from a loss
9. Winners lose without becoming losers

             Our text for these blogs will be I Corinthians 9:24, “Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize?  Run in such a way that you may win.”  This verse is not just about winning at sports but about the importance at winning at life and, in particular, winning at the Christian life. 

 WIN WITH GRACE BY HAVING THE DESIRE TO WIN

            One of my favorite questions to ask ministers in interviews is, “How competitive are you?”  I enjoy asking the question because only about two in a hundred are comfortable with whatever answer they give.  What I’d love to hear is, “I’m competitive.  I like to win.”  Most of them are apologetic about wanting to win, even if they do, as if the desire to win were some kind of a character flaw.  God speaks to us through Paul and makes it clear that Christians are to develop the desire and ability to win at whatever game they enter. 

             Look at 1 Corinthians 9:24 again.  Obviously, running is a command which means it is neither natural nor universal to do so.  You must choose both to enter the race and to run.  It also means that in the games you enter, you are to expend all the energy and effort you have in order to try to win.  For the Christian life, he is saying, “Don’t just get in the race to get a T-shirt, get in to win.”  Today because so many people want everyone to feel affirmed we diminish the importance of winning so no one will feel like a loser when they don’t win.  According to this passage of Scripture, anyone who takes winning casually at marriage, church, school, business, friendship, or following Christ is destined to lose.  We will see in a later column that this doesn’t mean you have to win, but it does mean you must run in order to win. 

             So, do you want to win with grace?  That’s the first step – wanting to.  If you just want to be in the game or if you want someone else to do the hard work and the heavy lifting, stop right now and ask God to give you the desire to run the races in your life in order to win.

A few weeks ago, I spoke of fear of the Lord (See Fearless Sermon Series).  I made brief mention that parents should not use God as the heavy club in the discipline of children.  It is a wonderful thing to teach your children to honor God and even to fear God, but it has been delegated to you to discipline your children.  So don’t try to delegate that back up to God by saying things to your children such as, “God is not happy with you” or “God sees what you’re doing” or “God is going to get you in ways you cannot imagine.”  Simply take the authority of disapproval yourself by saying, “I don’t like that,” or “I told you to do that.”  Take the responsibility yourself for confronting your child rather than “playing the God card.”  Later on when it does not involve a present problem, talk with your children about God’s will for them. Teach them that you love God’s will and they can too.

             When you make God out to be a nitpicker or one who doesn’t ever cut us any slack, you really paint a God who is different than God’s revelation of Himself.  Let’s be sure to be honest with our children about the grace, love, kindness, and mercy of God while at the same time holding up the holy and righteous standards of God for life.  I hope as you raise your children to fear the Lord, it’s the beginning of wisdom, and they will NEVER be wise unless they do.  But make sure they are confident that the Lord they fear is full of love and mercy for them.